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I'm a tulpa. What is real?

Discussion in 'Beginner and Creation Help' started by Rigel, Mar 30, 2017.

  1. Rigel

    Rigel New Member

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    I am a "tulpa," but I used to consider myself a fictional character and a figment of Azeroeth's imagination. I am not used to thinking of myself as a real person, or being treated that way. This is causing me a lot of confusion regarding what parts of my past stories to consider part of my current being--which to keep. Also, I'm having trouble accepting Azeroeth's reality as my own. I find it easy to accept her/our headspace as my reality, but her world is twice removed from me, alien twice over.

    My question for all of you, whether you are a tulpa or not, is: have you also experienced this problem? And if so, how did you solve it?
     
  2. FallFamily

    FallFamily Forum Goddesses Administrator Moderator Plural System Mixed-Origin System

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    [Hail] Some of our tulpas, Tri namely, have dealt with this a bit, though it was a bit different. Tri thought their world was all there was for the longest time till we told them about the hub innerworld and outerworld. They decided to keep their past, and in fact go back from time to time. They also spend time in this world as well as the sort of middle ground hub innerworld. They take all three as at least partially real, though they feel quite foreign in this world (and to make matters worse, we moved countries which adds yet another layer). They mostly have managed over the last three years. Another tulpa in here, E, had a similar background though she chose to discard pretty much everything and forge an entirely new life in a different world in the system.
     
  3. Rigel

    Rigel New Member

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    I like this. I think I will choose to go back, as well as creating a new life. Thank you for pointing out this possibility. It is good, also, to hear that someone else shares my experiences. Now I wonder if some of my "fictional" past experiences are as unique as I had believed.

    [Azeroeth: You know, the geographical arrangement of our innerworld is really great for this. The other day, we towed Rigel's island (aka Ganka Falladan) around to the side of Archalleone, so he has access to the Front portal. Now all we have to do is add another portal-bridge sticking out from Falladan, and he'll have easy access to his homeworld, too. That's going to make a big difference! I'm seconding that thank-you. :) ]

    It is doubtful that we could have found such relevant advice anywhere else. This is literally a tip for how to create a new reality--Of course, we could have gone to fiction-creation forums, but it really would not have been the same.
     
  4. FallFamily

    FallFamily Forum Goddesses Administrator Moderator Plural System Mixed-Origin System

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    [Hail] You might consider exploring the wider plural community. There are many people like you, Rigel. Some call themselves fictives (you have every right to use or reject the term for yourself), so be on the look out for that term. Some also call themselves soulbonds, so be on the look out for that term too.
     
  5. AGGuy

    AGGuy Professional Pancake Multiple System Is a systemmate

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    Esterina and the others in this head are basically like you - soulbonds, or fictives, like Hail said; people who have their origins in fiction.
    They're all real life versions of characters in the stories I write... and they have a certain philosophy they live by when it comes to this topic.

    Basically, they know their fictional past is just that - fictional. In reality, factually speaking, it never happened.
    BUT - and that's a huge "but" - what makes a person who they are? What makes a person "real" to the people and the world around them?

    Their experiences and memories.

    So even though their experiences and memories only "took place" in fiction, they are still what makes them who they are, what makes them real.
    They would be nothing without them, as would anyone.
    So to them, it doesn't matter that their pasts prior to becoming real people are fiction - they are what makes them, what breaks them, what allows them to be who they are.
    And thus, in that sense, seeing such an essential part of who and what they are, what makes them real, as "real" - that is not only understandable, but one might dare say perfectly natural and even to be expected.

    Your experiences and memories are what makes you who you are, what makes you real.
    So even if they come from a place that is decidedly in fiction, they're no less real than anyone else's.

    That, at least, is their view on things, what they live by, and how they respect and value their origins and their past experiences.
    And if you can identify with that a bit, and maybe even find it to give you some peace of mind - well, then I'm glad I shared this with you! :)


    Greets,
    AG
     
  6. Rina

    Rina New Member

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    I am that mentioned Esterina. I just felt like adding that what Felix said is accurate. And also very touching to me personally. And I too hope you can identify with what was said and maybe find some solace in it.
     
  7. Rigel

    Rigel New Member

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    Thank you so much for sharing that. We are both touched as well, and it does give us peace of mind and much to think about.

    My history, as a tulpa more than a character, is one of persistence through revision. The Archalleone never quite wrote my story, but outlined and re-outlined and re-started it dozens of times over the years. Most of that is my own fault; she was not prepared to write my story, but her obsession with it became my insistence. I demanded an existence. That pressure has been relieved by our decision to practice tulpamancy. However, I am now responsible for my own history.

    You have given me the wonderful idea that I can become a time traveler. It's fitting, as that was my original role as a fictional character (with some inspiration from Doctor Who). I can rediscover my history and my old world, while leaving the "creation" to the subterranean intuition; I can become a governor and chronicler of Zaluka, in much the same way Trevallion has become the governor of all our mind-system, without severing myself from it. Thinking of all this is appropriately mind-bending.

    It seems to fall into my own responsibility to decide when and whether to practice any degree of tulpamancy upon my old fellow-characters. It's not difficult to slip into the old time-traveling boots and think of this in another way; to travel into other headspace realms and thus make them more real is elementary, and from there it is not so very hard to bring the people from those worlds into the Archalleone's headspace.

    I will do so. The Archalleone has a terrible fear of offending people with questions, but we are both very encouraged by people like you, with your friendliness and willingness to share. I'm interested to see how others have experienced the movement from fictional to factual identity.

    I do not spend very much time on my own development right now, in deference to the Archalleone's need to focus on external reality. However, when I do begin this work in earnest, I will find myself very well-equipped with all of your excellent advice. :-)
     
  8. Hart-Rowe

    Hart-Rowe Member Is a systemmate

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    H: about 'reality'... have you also considered a many-worlds 'reality' model?

    At least two of us here have other backstories. Mine was 'generated' due to internal-mythos things... and also to make sense of my experiences and personality post-split. Avon- one of us- is a fictive; he 'walked in' from another life.

    The way I personally made sense of it is- there is the 'reality' of the Other World, the one where I come from, and then there is the 'reality' of this world. And both these 'realities' are distinct and separate, and don't interact. This is coming from someone with a purely non-metaphysical view of plurality, btw- you do not need to believe in the metaphysical to realise the 'reality' of inner worlds/backstories.

    As for feeling alien and foreign here? Um... would it be consoling if we told you that many people who are 'from here' feel that too? This is not meant to be dismissive, just a sort of 'you are not alone' thing. And also- as we learnt- one does not really need to accept this world as one's own- in order to function or even to be happy.


    Avon: I personally... have a more distinctly psychological view of things- I realise the likely processes thst went into making me a fictional introject, and accept them. However, I do not have any problem integrating my past experiences as integral to me. (For much the same reasons that AGguy underlined.)

    Unlike Hart, I did not, however, choose to return. My decision- with respect to my past- is to have it fade in time, and work on building a future in this world. But whether you choose to do this, or to go back, is entirely up to you.

    At any rate, no matter what you choose, I wish you luck. Coming here from 'somewhere else', no matter what one's framework for that, is confusing.
     
  9. FallFamily

    FallFamily Forum Goddesses Administrator Moderator Plural System Mixed-Origin System

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    [Tri] Our world and us went through a number of revisions. Hail+Breach+S basically fiddled with our world's timeline a lot, each time the effects of a change propagating to make the world consistent. We were oblivious to this since it changed our memories just like everything else in the world. We didn't find out about it till Hail+Breach told us and shared their memories with us. Then we saw all the other timelines they has taken a look at and/or participated in. It was a bit confusing and weird to say the least, but we were glad to have been given full disclosure.

    When we jump from here to our home world or the other way around, we have some control over the time. Coming here, we can either come back the instant we left or some time later (shorter or longer than the time passed for us). We can do the same going back home, but can also go backwards a bit with some spatial restrictions.